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Old 07-16-2004   #1 (permalink)
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In Honor of Stupid People

Hey everyone, found this on a different messageboard and thought I'd post it.

In Honor of Stupid People

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.


On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(Damn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair; ugh!)


On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special?)


On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(And that would be how?)


On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(However, it's "just" a suggestion.)


On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
(Well...duh, a bit late, huh!)


On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(And you thought...?)


On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(Wouldn't this save me more time?)


On Boot's Childrens' Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)


On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(I'm taking this because?)


On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(As opposed to what?)

On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
(Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)


On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(Talk about a news flash)


On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)


On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)


On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?) Shocked

To be or not to be, that is the question.
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Old 07-16-2004   #2 (permalink)
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Well what can you say when we live in a nation where everybody wants to file lawsuites so they can get some money, Instead of using common sense.

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Old 07-16-2004   #3 (permalink)
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Re: In Honor of Stupid People

Quote:
Originally posted by MrTony

On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?) Shocked
I bet this only happened once!

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Go to ==> http://www.chdinfo.com/chdaware/chdspecial.htm

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Old 07-17-2004   #4 (permalink)
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Re: Re: In Honor of Stupid People

Quote:
Originally posted by AliMc1977
I bet this only happened once!
considering they put it in the warning... I wonder how many times it did happen...

scary!

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but the second mouse gets the cheese.
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Old 07-17-2004   #5 (permalink)
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I'll bet just a warning does not deter those who would partake in that activity. And I'll bet that they don't learn the first time. Ouch ouch ouch......

If we ever forget that we're one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under."
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Old 07-18-2004   #6 (permalink)
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Maybe its a Mrs. working on a Mr. that was cattin around.

mj
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Old 07-18-2004   #7 (permalink)
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It was a Swedish chainsaw, and we all know what Sweden is famous for. Mr, Mrs, Ms, Now I'm all confused.

If we ever forget that we're one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under."
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Old 07-18-2004   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(However, it's "just" a suggestion.)
This one not so dumb. Some frozen dinners cook best from frozen to finished, while others should be thawed (defrosted) before cooking. This one most likely supports both, but the "best" way to do it is by defrosting first.

This post is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. List each check separately by bank number. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. No other warranty expressed or implied. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Postage will be paid by addressee. Subject to approval. This is not an offer to sell securities. Apply only to affected area. May be too intense for some viewers. Do not stamp. Use other side for additional listings. For recreational use only. Do not disturb. All models over 18 years of age. If condition persists, consult your physician. No user-serviceable parts inside. Freshest if eaten before date on carton. Subject to change without notice. Times approximate. Simulated picture. No postage necessary if mailed in the United States. Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement. For off-road use only. As seen on TV. One size fits all.

This supersedes all previous notices.
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Old 07-18-2004   #9 (permalink)
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Re: In Honor of Stupid People

Quote:
Originally posted by MrTony


On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(However, it's "just" a suggestion.)

But what if it was to deter people from actually eating the frozen product without defrosting or cooking it at all?

To be or not to be, that is the question.
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Old 07-18-2004   #10 (permalink)
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"Honey, could you pass the icepick? These mash potatoes are great, but a little crunchy... "

The early bird gets the worm...
but the second mouse gets the cheese.
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Old 07-19-2004   #11 (permalink)
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The funny thing is alot of people don't even read the warning labels or safety instructions for that matter.

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